The Warren
by Galadriel1010
Summary: Where the plot bunnies go to live when I don't have time to develop them fully. Mainly Janto, hoping to experiment with some Gwys later, spoilers expected up to Lost Souls. Fluff/Sci-fi mainly
1. Introduction

The Warren

This is the place where all the plot bunnies live. It's a receptacle for the bunnies that attack me when I really don't want them to, like when I'm in the middle of a bigger fic, but that I'd quite like to follow up at some point in the future. They're all roughly sketched out, but I might return to them to develop on them fully one day. Until that point they're a bit rough around the edges and going to good homes. If you think you'd like to do something with them then just send me a message and I'll take them down from here and they're all yours. Like I said, they're the fics I don't have time for at the moment, but you know what the bunnies get like.

Current list:  
Jack Harkness has reached critical extemporisation (complete)  
Attack of the plot bunnies (In progress, completion expected tomorrow)  
No (Near completion, expected tomorrow or the day after)  
Unexpected future (Near completion, expected tomorrow or the day after)  
A long anticipated appointment (Near completion, expected tomorrow or the day after)


	2. Critical Extemporisation

Title: Jack Harkness has reached critical extemporisation  
Word count: 525  
Summary: Jack and Ianto have a tradition, and Jack keeps getting better at it  
Rating: K  
Disclaimer: I do not own Torchwood or anything it involves. They are the property of the BBC  
Credit where credit's due: My brother, who told me that I had reached critical extemporisation when I told my concerned looking family that I was trying out a cake recipe for the first time and I didn't have all the ingredients but "It's OK, I'll extemporise." It worked too ;)  
Author's note: I'm intending to try out this meal on my family next week sometime, so I will get back to you with whether it works or not and a recipe. Fingers crossed

As usual, Ianto opened the door to be greeted by a wonderful blend of smells; spices, chicken, frying oil and onions… He dumped his bag on the sofa and wandered through to the kitchen to add coffee to the smorgasbord. The sight that greeted him made him smile.

Jack always took Wednesday afternoons off, alien invasions and rift activity permitting, to extemporise on dinner as a treat for Ianto. The first time had been a surprise after the daleks invaded, a way of telling him that he'd remembered what he was fighting for and that he was ready to start fighting again. By now though it was a ritual; Jack left early and went home via the market, Ianto left bang on half past five to get in just before six. Jack always invented the most wonderful meals, and tonight seemed to be no exception.

The Captain smiled at him affectionately and turned back to the stove. Ianto chuckled at the sight of the wooden spoon stuck in his back pocket. Sneaking up behind his lover silently, Ianto slipped his arms around his lover's waist and pressed a kiss to the side of his neck before resting his chin on his shoulder, "What did I do to deserve you?"

Jack leaned back into the embrace slightly and rested the hand not currently occupied by a spatula on top of Ianto's on his waist, "I sometimes wonder."

Ianto kissed him again, "It must have been something pretty wonderful, whatever it was. Coffee?"

"Yeah, that might have been it." He gave him a sidelong smile, "Yes please." Taking the spoon out of his pocket and setting it on the side with the spatula, he took the frying pan and dished the contents out onto two plates, before getting a dish out of the oven and placing it on the table.

Ianto brought two mugs of coffee and smiled as his lover uncorked a bottle of wine with long, elegant fingers. "So what have you created tonight?" He asked, trying not to respond to the thoughts and memories of what those fingers could do to him.

"Well it's a sort of honey grilled chicken with roasted vegetables, with fried mushrooms, onions and peppers." He explained as Ianto poured the wine and he served the food.

"It smells wonderful." He smiled and beckoned to him before he sat down, "Come here." Jack approached him around the table curiously, then smiled gently as Ianto cupped his chin and kissed him, "Thank you." The young man sighed

"What for?"

"Just generally thank you." They sat down and started eating; Ianto couldn't suppress a groan, "Oh God Jack, this is heavenly. Your best yet by far."

"You say that every week." He blushed slightly

"Yeah, well you get better every week, I didn't think that was possible!"

"Just wait till you try dessert." Jack smiled, "It involves chocolate, cherries and marshmallows. And rum."

"We might need a bit of weevil hunting to burn off the calories." Ianto suggested, a slightly raised eyebrow indicating exactly what type of weevil hunting he was thinking of

"I like the way you think Jones, Ianto Jones."


	3. Plot Bunnies 1

Title: Attack of the plot bunnies  
Word count: 400  
Summary: Sounds like the writers aren't the only ones who have problems with misbehaved rodents. Pre Exit Wounds first two chapters  
Rating: K  
Disclaimer: I do not own Torchwood or anything it involves. They are the property of the BBC  
Credit where credit's due: To the lovely members of Kemp's Men with whom I had a very entertaining weekend and who listened to me prattling about Torchwood with interest. Sirs, I salute you!  
Author's note: Written mostly on a morris tour. This was supposed to be a silly little one shot, but I got ideas.

"Jack", Tosh called, "I'm getting reports of a spaceship crash out in the Channel, UNIT are sending a full report through, they reckon we should check it out."

"Any idea why?" he asked, emerging from his office

She shook her head, but Ianto answered, "It changed course very slightly over Aberystwyth and from then on appeared t be in freefall, whereas before that point it had been a controlled descent."

"So either the pilot died…"

"Or the crew evacuated over Aberystwyth." Tosh finished without turning away from her computer.

"Well you would if you were in a spaceship and the pilot died." Ianto deadpanned

"Thank you Ianto, so what do they suggest we do Tosh?" Jack folded his arms

"I've sent the report from UNIT to the printer in your office, the security level's too high for me to be able to see it though. Your printer's the only one that will do it."

Jack disappeared into his office and returned with the report, "Ianto, can you sort higher security clearances for Tosh and the others? There's too few of us to mess around with different security levels."

He nodded, "I'll see what I can do, sir. I can definitely sort it for Tosh, we've got three top level clearances as standard."

"Well that'll be a start. OK, so… No SOS signal." He read from the report

"Surely if they thought they were crashing they would have sent out some sort of signal?"

"Correct, it's an automatic system." He closed the report and leant on the rails to look at them, "Someone cancelled the signal."

"Can you do that?" Tosh asked in surprise

"If you know what you're doing. There are a couple of ways to do it, some harder but more effective than others. Whatever you do it's not easy, it's not possible to turn it off accidentally."

"Why would you want to cancel an SOS?"

"If you didn't want anyone to know you were there, like if you knew you were somewhere you shouldn't be." He answered grimly

"So we might be in trouble?" Ianto asked

He ran a hand through his hair, "Possibly, let's see if we can find evidence of an escape pod before we jump to conclusions. It may all be perfectly…"

"Safe?" Ianto sighed, "Can we take than chance?"

"We don't have a choice. Unless we find that pod, there's nothing we can do."


	4. Plot Bunnies 2

Title: Attack of the plot bunnies  
Word count:  
Summary: Sounds like the writers aren't the only ones who have problems with misbehaved rodents  
Rating: K  
Disclaimer: I do not own Torchwood or anything it involves. They are the property of the BBC  
Credit where credit's due: To the lovely members of Kemp's Men with whom I had a very entertaining weekend and who listened to me prattling about Torchwood with interest. Sirs, I salute you!  
Author's note: Written mostly on a morris tour. This was supposed to be a silly little one shot, but I got ideas. Hopefully this will give some insight into the filing system I'm using for Torchwood 1, if not, this is how it works

Torchwood Analysis report

Case Number: λ75328  
Date: 05.05.09

Initial report:  
Spaceship (Unidentified) crashed in the Bristol Channel (Coordinates: .N/.W). Trajectory traced by UNIT (Report λ75328.1) and anomaly in trajectory located over Aberystwyth. Anomaly followed up by Torchwood 3 (Report λ75328.2 and λ75328.3.1) but no reason for change found, nor sign of threat.

Analysis of crash carried out by UNIT (Report λ75328.3.2). Impossible to retrieve or visit wreck

Status: No danger posed

Case unsolved: Closed

Signatories: Commander J. Nox (Torchwood 1)  
Captain J. Harkness (Torchwood 3)  
Brigadier A. Lethbridge-Stewart (UNIT UK Defence)

Shelf reference λ5K6I28

CASE CLOSED


	5. Plot Bunnies 3

Title: Attack of the plot bunnies  
Word count: 543  
Summary: Sounds like the writers aren't the only ones who have problems with misbehaved rodents. Post Journey's End from here on in  
Rating: K  
Disclaimer: I do not own Torchwood or anything it involves. They are the property of the BBC  
Credit where credit's due: To the lovely members of Kemp's Men with whom I had a very entertaining weekend and who listened to me prattling about Torchwood with interest. Sirs, I salute you!  
Author's note: Written mostly on a morris tour. This was supposed to be a silly little one shot, but I got ideas.

3 Months later

"Jack." He looked up at Gwen's call and stood, strolling casually out of his office, "Jack, Andy's sent me a report he thinks we should have a look at."

He bounded down the stairs to look over her shoulder and grabbed the report from the printer as he passed, "What has he got for us today?"

"You could just read the report Jack." She chided, "Anyway, the police have been trying to crack an organised crime ring for about a month, and they've had some leads but nothing viable. The reports were all put down to pranksters or drugs or whatever because witnesses were reporting giant rabbits, but an officer's seen them. There really are giant rabbits running a crime ring in Cardiff."

"How giant?" was all he asked

"Six foot." She answered glaring pointedly at the report.

"Yeah, big rabbits. Cross reference with Torchwood 1. It's ringing bells, but nothing much." He sighed in frustration at how much he'd lost over 2000 years, "And get this report sent to Jazz, she'll be able to start us a new case file if it's new."

She nodded and turned back to her work, filling in the appropriate files, and Jack wet over to Ianto's station to see what he was doing, "Just doing the follow up on that weevil sighting last week. Not much left to do…" Ianto was the expert at this; deleting the blogs and videos just added fuel to the fire, but changing a word here or there… it was barely noticeable but it could make a huge difference, reducing the credibility and accuracy until no one apart from a few die-hards believed it. Jack watched in fascination and admiration as "this is an alien" became "this could be an alien" and "my friend took this video" became "my friend gave me this video". Tiny changes, huge differences.

"There." He sat back and closed the program, "That's the last of the purple priotity pages, anything below that is too obscure to be worth bothering me about. Jay will send me anything that needs doing that she can't deal with. Do you want a coffee?"

Jack just smiled and rested his hands on Ianto's shoulders, rubbing gently, "Yes, but are you sure you want to go and get me one?"

He moaned as Jack's hands went to work, loosening the tension in his shoulders and the back of his neck. His head fell back and he melted at Jack's soft, affectionate smile, "You deserve a coffee."

"You're too tense though, you deserve this more. Come on, head forwards." He complied and felt Jack's fingers working their magic further down his back. Shortly before the point where Ianto would forget where they were and turn on Jack in the middle of the Hub with Gwen in attendance, the Welshwoman in question announced her presence with the quiet cough of someone who who doesn't want to intrude but has to.

"Sorry, but Andy's called me. D.I. Padstock wants to meet you as soon as possible; it's about these rabbits." She looked like she thought that that was the stupidest thing she'd ever had to say.

Ianto went to fetch Jack's coat without a word, he didn't trust himself not to laugh.


	6. Plot Bunnies 4

Title: Attack of the plot bunnies  
Word count:1249  
Summary: Sounds like the writers aren't the only ones who have problems with misbehaved rodents. Post Journey's End from here on in  
Rating: K  
Disclaimer: I do not own Torchwood or anything it involves. They are the property of the BBC  
Credit where credit's due: To the lovely members of Kemp's Men with whom I had a very entertaining weekend and who listened to me prattling about Torchwood with interest. Sirs, I salute you!  
Author's note: Written mostly on a morris tour. This was supposed to be a silly little one shot, but I got ideas. My first attempt at a teeny bit of Gwys

D.I. Padstock looked up from his desk as the American from Torchwood strode into the room, closely followed by Gwen Cooper, a woman he'd known when she was on the force. He stood to greet them, "Captain Harkness, Miss Cooper, or should it be Mrs Williams? Many congratulations by the way."

"Thank you." She shook his extended hand, "I've not changed my name professionally, but if you want to use Williams I'm perfectly happy with that."

"Williams it is then, I'm a believer in tradition." For some reason that earned him a less than pleased glance from Harkness, "Anyway, Andy says I should talk to you about these rabbits we've had reports of. I was inclined to ignore them, but he says that we should look into it, thinks that they could be real."

"You don't think they are?" Harkness asked, taking a seat

"What would six foot rabbits be doing in Cardiff?" he asked

"Running a crime ring?" Gwen suggested, "Look, detective…"

"Call me Daniel, I'm under no misconceptions about where I stand with you lot, you're a bit legendary around here."

"OK Daniel, we need to know everything you can tell us about the giant rabbits, everything you can think of. Especially the stuff that didn't make it into the reports."

"Because we know it feels stupid enough writing that witnesses reported a giant rabbit, let alone what they had to say about it." Harkness added with a practically luminescent smile.

The detective settled back in his chair uncomfortably and watched them carefully, it seemed like this was perfectly normal for them; from what Kathy had told him, it was. "OK," he sighed, "I hope this makes more sense to you than it does to me…"

* * *

Nearly two hours later they were back in the conference room, collating what they knew. Ianto started, "Jay's got the results of her search back to me, they're a species called the Tablato which fit the description we've got. They're a race of six-foot tall humanoids but with a distinctly rabbit-like appearance. Normally peaceable, compared to humans at least, but with a couple of criminal families."

"Not many species don't." Jack smiled at him, "Anything else she's found?"

"They're allergic to carrots, lots of history of the planet… The only contact we've had was a visitor back in the 1980s, bumped into UNIT and chatted to one of their researchers for a while. She was happy to tell the soldier the history of her planet in return for the history of ours. She left after about three hours, once her ship had refuelled."

Jack shook his head in amusement, "I love it when that happens. Torchwood Tower's becoming a drop in centre for any alien who wants a chat and a cup of tea, just the way it's supposed to be. Gwen, do you want to summarise what we found out?"

"A couple of months ago the police started getting extra problems, new supplies of weapons circulating, better organised stings in some areas. At first they thought it was to do with… you know, the elephant in the room, but after a while they weren't so sure. They investigated, of course, but didn't think they were getting anywhere because all they ever got were reports of these giant rabbits. Then in a stake-out on a completely different case, an officer saw one of the giant rabbits and got a photo. It could just be a very elaborate disguise, but the fact that it's not quite a rabbit and these previous reports made them suspicious."

Jack studied the picture and laughed, "Of course! Blingata."

"Blingata?" Ianto asked in confusion

"Yeah, one of my conquests back in the heady days of space piracy, when I was a Captain Jack Sparrow. She had a spaceship, I had the looks, I travelled with her for about five months, then stole the ship and left her behind." He looked slightly guilty, "I intend to go back and get her, once I get round to that point again. Just drop her off at home and say 'thanks for the lift, sorry about the ship' and all that. She was part of the Naran family, their version of the Mafia, although it was turning into something more like the Goliath corporation when I was there last."

"Which was?" Ianto asked, slight amusement in his tone

"Oh, in about one and a half thousand years. You know, I had hoped for some jealousy Ianto…"

"Why? It won't happen for one and a half thousand years. Or it happened over two thousand years ago. Nothing to worry about at the moment. Besides, I'm the one you spend every night with."

"Not that this isn't cute and all that…" Gwen interrupted, "Can we concentrate on the rabbits please?" she groaned, "On second thoughts, carry on."

Jack laughed, "Right, rabbits. Tablato, what can we do?"

"The police are going to pass everything on to us as they get it. It's sort of our case, but they are better equipped to find out what's going on. We need to tap the community, see if anyone's heard anything, or if they know anything." She wasn't talking about the community that had community leaders who talked to the media, she meant the alien community of Cardiff who kept their heads down and looked out for each other. Some heads were more conspicuous than others.

Jack stood and drained his coffee, smiling at his team, "I think a trip to the pub is called for. Gwen, can you mind the shop whilst we're gone?"

She nodded and watched the couple leave the base together, Ianto helping Jack with his coat as always. Moments like this always had her reaching for the phone to call Rhys, he answered on the second ring, "Hey love, everything OK down there?" he asked in concern

"Yeah, yeah, everything's fine. It's a quiet day really, Jack and Ianto have gone to the pub, trying to find a lead, so I'm manning the Hub. I wanted to talk to you. You're not busy are you?"

"No, just doing the finances, it can wait. What you up with then?"

"I can't tell you what we're investigating at the moment, not over the phone. But it's weird. Not the usual Torchwood weird either, weirder, just strange."

"Dangerous?" his tone was worried

"No, not at the moment." She reassured him, "Just bizarre, mind-boggling. You'll laugh when I tell you about it tonight."

"I can't wait." He told her sincerely, "You going to be home for dinner?"

"I don't know." She sighed, leaning forwards on her desk, "it depends on how fast this case progresses. Tell you what, why don't we go out somewhere? Jack'll give me the time if I ask, there's nothing going on here after all."

"Sounds good to me, somewhere close to you?"

"Yeah, how about that restaurant on the end of the Bay? It was nice last time we went."

"Yeah, you deserve a treat love."

"So do you." She thought back to the conversation she'd overheard between Jack and Ianto, "I don't know where I would have been without you the last few months. I am the luckiest girl in the world."

"You're a heroine love, and don't you forget it. I've got to go though, someone's come in wanting to see me, shall we say half six?"

"Half six sounds good, I'll see you there." She smiled as she flipped her phone shut, determined that she would enjoy tonight.


	7. Plot Bunnies 5

Title: Attack of the plot bunnies  
Word count: 1321  
Summary: Sounds like the writers aren't the only ones who have problems with misbehaved rodents.  
Rating: K  
Disclaimer: I do not own Torchwood or anything it involves. They are the property of the BBC  
Credit where credit's due: To the lovely members of Kemp's Men with whom I had a very entertaining weekend and who listened to me prattling about Torchwood with interest. Sirs, I salute you!  
Author's note: Written mostly on a morris tour. This was supposed to be a silly little one shot, but I got ideas.

Jack flashed his hundred watt grin at the barmaid as she gave him his drinks, "Thanks Toran. I need your help, if you've got a couple of minutes we'll be over there."

The alien blinked at him, her large eyes twinkling with amusement, "Should have known Captain, you never come in here unless you need something."

"It's always just and excuse to see your pretty face darling, but don't tell Ianto I said that."

"Your secret's safe with me, I'll be over as soon as I can." She blinked at him again and turned to serving the next customer, whose orange skin clashed horribly with her purple scales.

Jack shook the thought from his head and carried their drinks across to the table where Ianto was already deep in conversation with a couple of aliens, his jacket and tie lying on the seat beside him. The Captain picked them up and hung them on the back of a chair, earning him a warm smile from his partner, and slid in beside him. Once he was settled the conversation resumed, "Captain, your partner has told us of the police's investigation. We will help you if we can, we don't want more attention drawing to our community than necessary, and if this has spread beyond these newcomers…"

One of the others turned to him and pointed a tentacle, "We will only help if it is purely Torchwood operated. You will not succeed without our help, and we do not wish the police to be involved."

He nodded, trying not to get annoyed at that pointing tentacle, "That's not an issue, the D.I. in charge of the case understands the position. They will pass information on to us, we will deal with it. I would like to deal with it without having to use violence, if that is possible."

"You want to meet with the people involved?" The first one asked

"Can you arrange that?"

Toran had approached silently and took a seat carefully, "I can arrange it. One of them comes in here regularly; I will advise him that it would be best for him to meet with you. I will send you a message with a time; be here, at this table, at the time I send."

"Just me?" he took a sip and maintained eye contact, Toran ran the show here in Cardiff, and she wasn't too secretive about it

"Just you Captain, it would be wise not to put Ianto in danger, and they will feel more comfortable if there is only one, even one with your… reputation."

"You think there will be danger?" Ianto asked, squeezing Jack's hand gently, "More than the usual I mean."

"I do not expect danger, but it is best to be prepared." She shrugged, "Now if you'll excuse me, I have customers to serve." The slim, attractive (to Jack anyway) alien sashayed towards the bar; sliding behind it with practiced ease and pulling down what Jack recognised to be the ingredients of a hyper-vodka. He was tempted, but they had work to do

"Refill Yan?" he asked, "I think we've got time for one more."

"We should get back to Gwen, we've given her enough time to call Rhys now."

Jack laughed, "Do you think she knows that we know?"

"I don't think she cares, but come on, maybe we'll startle her." Ianto stood and grabbed his jacket and tie again, putting them on quickly and waving to Toran as he led the way out of the little bar and up the stairs. The bar was in the centre of Cardiff, underneath one of the more popular clubs, but it used a perception filter so that no one saw the stairs or the door at the bottom. They walked back through the centre of Cardiff hand in hand, waving greetings to a few people they met on the way before crossing the Plass to the invisible lift.

The lift descended into a sort of well of calm; Myfanwy soared past them as though pleased to see them, a computer beeped quietly to itself and Gwen smiled at them over the top of her book, "Productive trip?"

Jack jumped off first and went over to her station, leaning against the desk to talk to her, "Yeah, Toran's arranging a meeting for us, well for me…"

Gwen closed her book, "I don't trust her, I don't know why but there's something I don't like about her."

"She's got her ulterior motives, I admit, but she's a nice girl. In a strictly professional kind of way of course." He smiled up towards the kitchen area where he knew Ianto was making coffee, "She's got a good position in the community, she wouldn't do anything to jeopardise that."

"If you say so…" the young woman looked sceptical, "You know her better than we do." Ianto brought three cups of coffee down and placed one on her desk, handing another to Jack and taking a sip from the last, "Thanks Ianto pet. Is it alright if I get off at about quarter past six tonight Jack? Rift permitting of course."

"Sure, I dare say Ianto and I can hold the fort on our own tonight." Jack gave one of his hundred watt grins again, "Is Rhys cooking?"

She blushed, "No, we're going out for a meal, that restaurant on the Bay."

"Nice place, enjoy your evening. But until then you can give us a hand with this filing."

"Joy." She muttered, smiling at the look of surprise on Ianto's face, "Oh come on, we've nothing better to do, have we? Come on, lead us to your lair."

The young man blushed and led the way to a room deep in the archives, a room which turned out to be completely full of filing cabinets, leaving room for the table and enough space to walk around it, "Welcome to where I work, Gwen. It's an approach I borrowed from Jay, except she would have more room for filing cabinets as she just uses the floor."

"You what?" Gwen blinked in confusion

"The head of Torchwood 1, you know, her office floor is covered in papers and the desk is shoved against the wall. She sits in the middle of the floor and gets through about a million post-it notes a day. She is the reason Staples keeps going, on her own."

"I think I need a trip to London to understand her system." Gwen muttered, as Ianto had been suggesting she go for several months now. "Anyway, where do we start?"

"Well." Ianto pulled his jacket and tie off and hung them on the hook on the back of the door, then put his hands on his hips, "We can work through that cabinet, if you take the laptop, Gwen, we can tell you what you're looking for. Or Jack can tell you what you're looking for and I'll file it away."

"Conveyor belt system." Jack grinned, pulling open the first drawer of the indicated filing cabinet, "What are we working through here Ianto?"

"Unknown species." The captain groaned, "Yep, anything we can get a name to we can file here. Anything else Jay's going to take back with her next time she comes over, wrap her brain around it for a bit."

"Lucky her." Jack pulled out a report and flicked through it, "Lucky us…"

Gwen had disappeared for her dinner with Rhys and they'd managed to get through a full cabinet before Jack got the message through from Toran, it was one word. "Now."

They were in action immediately, communicating without words as they hurried back up to the main Hub. Ianto helped Jack to put his coat on and kissed him on the cheek before he left, "Be careful, keep your comms on so I know what's going on." He just nodded as he stepped onto the lift and let it carry him up to the Plass.


	8. Plot Bunnies 6

Title: Attack of the plot bunnies  
Word count: 801  
Summary: Sounds like the writers aren't the only ones who have problems with misbehaved rodents.  
Rating: K  
Disclaimer: I do not own Torchwood or anything it involves. They are the property of the BBC  
Credit where credit's due: To the lovely members of Kemp's Men with whom I had a very entertaining weekend and who listened to me prattling about Torchwood with interest. Sirs, I salute you!

Author's note: Written mostly on a morris tour. This was supposed to be a silly little one shot, but I got ideas.

For the second time that day, Jack entered the pub quietly, not making one of his grand entrances, they were neither necessary nor welcome here, and made his way to the bar. He ordered a cola, mindful of how much he'd drunk area, and went to the designated table. The bar was surprisingly empty, and Toran was casting glances at the customers who were still around. He recognised them, leaders of the community, tough characters who would back up whichever side she'd chosen, hopefully his. After a couple of minutes the door swung open and three Tablato strode in as if they owned the place, guns clearly concealed. Jack sighed and took another sip from his drink, it was always the same; the most confident ones were the easiest to win over.

Putting his drink down he stood and extended a hand, "Gentlemen, lady, pleasure to meet you, Captain Jack Harkness."

The female smiled bitterly, "I would say pleasure to meet you Jack, but I'd be lying."

"You're probably right there, you're probably right. Do I get to learn your names?" he smiled at her and sat down again, watching them take their seats

"No. You don't need to know who we are."

"OK." He smiled, 'Emerson, Lake and Palmer it is then' he thought to himself. "I'm sure you know what I want to talk to you about…"

"Yes, leave it Jack." One of the males said, smiling grimly, "It doesn't concern you. If you get involved, you will get hurt."

"We know all about you, about Torchwood, about your young man. Interfere with us and you will put them in danger."

Jack raised his eyebrows, "Touch him and you will regret ever coming to this planet. And just so we're clear; that was not a threat, it was an accurate prediction of the future. Now I will tell you, stop your operations."

"Or what?" the one he'd called Palmer in his mind leaned forwards with a smirk, "You won't find our operations, you won't find our sources. You can't do anything."

"Number 13 Bute Street." He smiled at the shock on their faces, leaning back, "If you're going to operate in an area with a high alien population, don't use so much alien tech. It shows up on the scans, that much stuff in one small area…" They were shifting uncomfortably now, so he sighed and leaned forwards, "You're part of the Naran family, right?" Emerson nodded nervously, "Yeah, thought so. Don't mess with me, most of the criminal families across the universe use my name, one of my names, as a swearword because I've ripped most of them off. Slitheen, Ralgeen, Naran, Flotskada, Mafia… I'm cleverer and more devious than you'll ever be."

"So what do you want Captain? You want in?"

He laughed, "Don't be daft, I've gone straight, got myself a life, a job, a partner… No, I want you to stop supplying guns and weapons to Cardiff's underworld, because you're putting lives in danger and drawing attention to this community. Either leave, if you can, or get registered and settle down here. If you stay here, your life of crime is over. Do I make myself clear?" They nodded mutely, high flying criminals reduced to naughty school children by his over-large personality. He chuckled, "Don't feel too bad, I've got a couple of hundred years of cunning and subterfuge on you. And I've got my feet under the table here, people respect me, even if they don't like me. You'll have to start form the bottom and work up, and this community doesn't like having attention drawn to it. Toran's the place to start, and if you put a toe out of line, she's where it'll finish. I expect I'll see you around at some time."

He took his glass back to the bar, leaving three confused and scared Tablato behind him, "Keep an eye on them for me?" he asked quietly

"Of course Captain." She smiled, "And thank you, we can always trust you to be… discreet."

He laughed, "Ianto would disagree. Speaking of which, I'd better head back. I'll be seeing you."

As the lift descended he saw Ianto waiting for him at the bottom with a mug of coffee. He accepted it gratefully and just breathed in the aromas for a while before it was cool enough to drink. Ianto had picked up his own mug and was oscillating gently on his chair in front of him; he smiled warmly and took Jack's hand in his own, "I love it when you get all protective of me."

He chuckled, "You heard that?"

"Every word. And aren't you glad that I managed to get their warehouse for you?"

"And right on time too, Ianto Jones, you're a wonder."

"I do my best, sir."

FIN


	9. Outside Dalek

AN: OK, this is one of the ones that got away from me a bit, I intend to come back to it sooner or later, but at the moment I can't figure it out. It's what was happening in the rest of the world whilst the Doctor and Rose were in Utah for Dalek

* * *

Jasmine went through her emails, forty in the last hour. Spam, spam, UNIT, Torchwood 2, UNIT, Torchwood internal, UNIT, Liberty Towers, Ianto, Torchwood 3 official – so probably Jack, Liberty Towers again, Adam…

Scanning briefly through the formal ones, the requests for information, and batting them down to Mark, she opened the message from Adam excitedly. He was her contact with Henry Van Statten, a megalomaniac collector of alien artefacts who she'd been trying to get a hold on for years. Then Adam had tracked Torchwood down and, well, he'd found a rather attractive and extremely flirtatious young lady. She'd learnt from the best, and he'd been easy to charm to her own purposes; she didn't feel all that guilty about it, maybe a little bit, but she knew who he was and that he would need her help in a year or two. Jazz would be there to pick up the pieces when he messed up.

OK, scratch a year or two, she thought as she read through his message. He was jabbering about a girl and a man who had arrived in one of the lower levels of the archives. The man was an alien calling himself a doctor, which gave her about six hours until the place was filled with concrete.

She grabbed her jacket from the other chair in her office and hurtled down the corridor with two phones going and yelling for Mark as she went. He met her in the car park as she held open the door of her Noble. "You gonna explain?" he began, but she made a vague sort of gesture that clearly meant 'kinda busy, talk later' as she replied to whoever was on the phone with her

"Yeah, can you get it ready for me? I don't have time to ready it when I get there."

"Yep." She started the engine and set off, apologising silently to him with a glance. Mark sat back, slightly mollified, and waited for her to finish. Before she did, however the other phone rang and she passed it over to him, hanging up her previous conversation as she did. "It's Ianto, I can't talk 'cos I'm driving."

He nodded and took the call, "Hey Ianto mate, care to tell me what's going on?"

"Actually, it's Jack, but we can't find my phone. We think it's in my trousers but…"

"OK, stop there, my mind's filling in the blanks. What's going on sir?" he was always a bit cautious around the garrulous American captain.

"Jazz is better qualified to answer that question, cos I haven't a clue." He sounded a bit annoyed, "I just want you to tell her not to let Him see her. She knows not to stop it, but…"

"OK, I'll pass the message on, we'll keep you posted. That's assuming she keeps me posted of course." He hung up and looked at her questioningly as he realised they were heading to City Airport.

"When Jack and I travelled with the Doctor, he and Rose had just had a companion, not a friend as such, called Adam who tried to mess with time for his own benefit. They met him in Utah, in an underground collection of alien artefacts in 2012." She explained

"2012?"

"Today, to be precise." She pursed her lips and glared at a Jeremy Clarkson wannabe in a BMW, "He's brilliant, he managed to hack into Torchwood, trying to buy stuff from us for Van Statten, you remember the one?"

"Yeah, I remember. About a year ago?"

"Yes, well since then he and I have been in regular contact and I've sort of been using him to get in there. I need to get hold of that stuff before the place is filled with concrete."

He looked at her in surprise, "You used him, that's not like you…"

Jasmine looked quietly grateful, "I'd like to think not. But I know what's going to happen to him, I know I can help when it does."

"Why don't you stop it?" her exasperated glance answered that one, "Oh, fair point. So… what are we doing?"

"He sent me an email this morning telling me that the Doctor was there. God only knows why he felt the need to tell me, but I'm glad he did. It's given us six hours to get there and requisition the stuff."

"Which we couldn't do before because that would change time."

"Exactly, so we have six hours to get to an underground bunker in Utah, and I have about a ten minute window to do what I need to do."

"Which is?" They pulled into the car park of the airport, flashing their IDs which got them through to a private car park and then onto the airport runway where a small two-man jet was waiting for them.

"You need the full story from the beginning I think, because otherwise it won't make sense. We've got several hours between here and there though, so bare with me until we get airborne?" They were now settling into the plane with Jazz as pilot and Mark as co-pilot, so he agreed and concentrated on getting them the clearances they needed. Within minutes they were taxiing down the runway, Jazz's UNIT clearances gave her access to military only airspace and enabled her to clear the route ahead of them, so it was an incredibly easy flight. As they relaxed, letting the auto-pilot take over, she turned to him and adopted her story telling mode, "OK, so it all begins with Henry Van Statten, who owns the internet, quite literally. For years now he's been running the show, every show. He chooses presidents, dictates policy and no one ever knows. And he's obsessed with aliens, he collects every thing and he uses it, like Torchwood used to, except he's better, more clueless and more self-serving."

"How?"

"He's better at making things work for him because he pays better even than Torchwood, and he's more ruthless. He's more clueless because he doesn't know what anything is, he doesn't have the information that they had. And more self-serving because after his own knowledge he's only after the money."

"So what do we do?"

"Ah, now here's the really interesting thing. Not long ago, a blue box arrived in one of the lower levels. Level 43 if my memory serves me right."

"The TARDIS." He realised with a smile

"Yep, which set a whole chain of events in motion. Van Statten's only living exhibit" she said the word with disgust, "comes fully to life, almost out of a coma, because it recognises the Doctor." The fear in her voice told him all he needed to know; there was only one thing she was that scared of, "A Dalek."

"Yeah…" with difficulty she dragged herself back to the conversation, "And it'll kill everyone, well most of them, but Rose saves the day and she, the Doctor and Adam survive. Once it's over, one of the workers there, a woman called Goddard, will order the place filled with concrete and the Doctor and Rose will leave with Adam in the TARDIS."

"So between them leaving and the place being filled with concrete we requisition the stuff."

"And hire Goddard, I have a feeling she's very good."


End file.
